Reasons to be cheerful: Aaron Ramsey is playing regularly again, sort of

It’s not pushing a point too hard to suggest Wales don’t have the greatest record at the World Cup. It’s 1958 – and that’s it. Having said that, they did get to the quarter-finals that year, and may well have won the whole thing had John Charles not been kicked out of the competition. Also, in the process, they scored the greatest goal in the entire history of the whole goddamn thing. Ivor Allchurch, boneddigion a boneddigesau, knocking Diego Maradona, Carlos Alberto, Maxi Rodríguez, Dennis Bergkamp, Esteban Cambiasso, Archie Gemmill, Saeed Al-Owairan, Michael Owen and Marco Tardelli into a jauntily-cocked hat.

Since then, the bread has always somehow landed toasted-cheese-with-a-healthy-spread-of-mustard-and-a-splash-of-Worcestershire-sauce side down for the Welsh, Joe Jordan, Paul Bodin, all that. However, 64 years of hurt could soon come to an end, with Wales just two games away from making it to the Ethics World Cup in Popularity’s Qatar this November. Austria provide the first hurdle to be cleared, tonight in Cardiff, and while the erstwhile wunderteam boast some fine talent in David Alaba, Marcel Sabitzer and Marko Arnautovic, there are reasons to be optimistic. Aaron Ramsey is playing regular football again, sort of, at Ibrox, while Gareth Bale has got his handicap down to 3.1 and is really dialling in his short irons at the moment.

Even if Ramsey and Bale manage to add to their combined total of 56 international goals this evening and make it through, it’s not clear where or when or against whom they’ll play any final eliminator. Tonight’s victors are slated to face the winner of the tie between Scotland and Ukraine, which, well, y’know. But that’s a problem for another day/few months, so Wales are understandably