Rangers fans win the 'Paranoia Cup' as Celtic diehards stick the Hotline boot in ahead of SPFL Premiership kick-off

Buckle up folks! The Premiership rollercoaster is about to begin and Hotline callers are already up and down and driving each other round the bend with their predictions.

Lets start with some positive energy ahead of Saturday's big kick off. John Bruce emailed: “Michael Beale has assembled a very strong squad for Rangers’ assault on this year's title. Starting with 6ft5in England international keeper Jack Butland who gives the team presence at the back. The signing of Jose Cifuentes has really excited the fans and, along with his new team-mates Cantwell and Raskin, will rejuvenate and energise the midfield, bringing much needed power and pace.

"With the attacking skills of Danilo, Dessers and Lammers up front the manager certainly looks like he has built an aggressive side who will play on the front foot and one that Rangers fans can't wait to see at home and in Europe.”

Now for the negative stuff.... Eddie Easson, Ballingry, said: “My predictions for Beale the Speil's excuses for the year: If Rangers go out the Champions League - ‘my 10 new players need time to settle’. If they are behind Celtic at Christmas - ‘I want to rebuild the defence because I forgot about that In the summer, I need six defenders’. If Rangers don't win the league it will be: ‘we are focusing on Europe’.”

Henry Moffat, Stirling, isn’t impressed with Rangers’ latest signing Cifuentes. He said: “I had to laugh when I seen Rangers actually paying cash for Cifuentes. This is a player who has been hawked all over Europe by his fairytale telling agent in the last two years. I remember Celtic fans watching his games and demanding the club don’t sign him as he couldn’t hit a straight ten yard pass.”

Cifuentes became Rangers’ ninth summer signing