PETA Doesn't Want You To Eat Wings During The Super Bowl

Sorry everyone, but you won't be able to eat those buffalo wings at your Super Bowl parties tomorrow night.

No, it's not because the meat has gone bad. 

And no, there's no major wing recall on the most cherished chicken day of all, where 1.45 BILLION wings are expected to be devoured during Sunday's big game.

But rather, you can't eat wings tomorrow because our old friends from PETA said so.

Yes, that's right.

Those super friendly and lovely people over at the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals posted the absurd, wing-hating statement across their social media channels earlier this week. Their genius caption on the post read, "Your Super Bowl ‘snack’ cost her life," while including a cartoon drawing of a chicken that reads, "I need my wings, you don't."

It took less than a minute for rationale and intelligent people to respond and inform PETA that the majority of chickens actually don't fly with their wings, nor do they even need them. (In fact, the longest chicken flight ever recorded lasted 13 seconds. Are you going to ruin your Super Bowl party over a 13-second record-holding chicken?)

Enjoy PETA backtracking when they are called out:

When I tell you, I nearly fell off my chair reading that comment. 
For as much as I hate the Internet, I love it for moments just like this.

Quick, someone give me $300 so I can buy a Cameo from the Dos Equis commercial guy to read this in his voice:

We salute you, the finger-licking, meat-eating, wing-devouring human being who isn't about to have their Super Bowl party ruined because of the pathetic PETA people.

Or how about Jim Nantz? Does anyone have his phone number? How do we get him to refer to the football tomorrow as a ‘pigskin’ the entire game? I'm sure PETA will love