Bubba Wallace been feeling 'miserable,' calls fine 'best thing' - ESPN

LONG POND, Pa. — Bubba Wallace and his wife have a baby on the way and a mortgage to pay on their home. So when Wallace eyed a pack of media at Pocono Raceway, he decided he would be the one to open with a question.

«Anybody got any money?» he quipped.

Wallace was a bit light in the wallet this week after NASCAR fined him $50,000 for retaliatory contact against race winner Alex Bowman on the cooldown lap of the Chicago Street Race.

Wallace door-slammed Bowman's car and sent it into the wall.

The move cost Wallace some cash, for sure — and yes, driving for Michael Jordan's 23XI Racing team, he can afford the fine. More than that, Wallace said the incident opened his eyes to the fact that he really wasn't acting like the person he wanted to be at the track.

«The penalty was probably the best thing that's happened to me,» Wallace said Saturday. «I've been miserable for years.»

Wallace, 30, has long been open about dealing with depression, triggered by both personal and professional struggles. Known for wearing his heart on his sleeve, Wallace acknowledged he hasn't been a beacon of joy at the track as he approaches almost two years since his last Cup Series victory. He starts 29th in the No. 23 Toyota on Sunday at Pocono.

«I've been walking around with a persona I'm not proud of,» Wallace said.

Wallace apologized for his recent behavior to everyone from his publicist to a journalist he brushed off last week to Bowman and even the NASCAR official who informed him of the fine.

«I'm just frustrated. I'm trying way too hard,» Wallace said. «I'm not focused on the right things.»

Wallace has wrestled with his role as an agent of change in NASCAR following his successful spark to help the industry ban the Confederate flag in 2020.