Tchouameni 2022: A Manchester United transfer manifesto for the next great defensive midfielder

Captain's Log, the year is 2022.

This year they've announced that there's going to be a fourth instalment of the Star Trek reboot starring Chris Pine, hence the homage in my intro, and that's the most significant thing that's happened so far this year.

Unfortunately, we can only wish that was the case, as Russia has invaded Ukraine bringing war back to Europe and the effects of the pandemic lockdown still linger in the air as the world tries to move on but is inevitably stuck in time.

It seems hard to talk about football when there are much more serious things happening in the world, but sometimes a game that involves eleven men kicking a ball around on the pitch can be a welcome distraction from the problems of the world, while at the same time it can use its influence to send a message if necessary.

To that end we thought we'd write something a little different. You probably remember Kanye 2024 (ironically he has also been in the news for all the wrong reasons recently) or even Trump 2020, as they put forward their manifestos for a presidential campaign.

Our colleagues over at Liverpool.com had some fun with it, putting forward their transfer manifestos for the likes of Jadon Sancho to join their club and look how well that worked out, with him now plying his trade at Manchester United.

So we thought we'd do the same, so if you're reading this Aurelien Tchouameni, here's why you should join United this summer.

The French Connection

Tchouameni has recently become a key part of France's set-up and though his performances for Monaco have gained him serious plaudits, it was his national team performances that put him on many teams' radars.

So why not give him a chance to play with a number of familiar faces at United?

Paul